cyclical

16 Jun

For friends who saw me this weekend, I may have appeared to be a bit more of a sad sack than usual. This wasn’t an illusion, I really was, and still kind of am. At the best of times, I recognize that I’m basically a sarcastically amusing Eyeore. When things get a little overwhelming, as they have been the last couple of weeks, I tend to lose the “amusing” part, and people occasionally start to look on in worry.

Rest assured, you don’t really need to. I’ll come out of it naturally.

The last couple of weeks have been a bit on the overwhelming side. I tend to get kind of down this time of year anyway, culminating around Father’s Day (as most you know); that, combined with the extra load dropped on me at work recently (which I’m nailing, but it’s still more than I’m used to here), a certain home improvement project that will be a consistent low-level stressor until it actually gets scheduled and completed (very soon now, if projected schedules are to be believed), the budgetary fallout from that project (again, theoretical until I actually start managing it) and your basic end-of-school year flurry of activity and various other life crap, I’m just wrung out and tired; physically and (especially) mentally and emotionally. That’s all, really.

Well, the fact that this morning is kind of a special case of the universe taunting me doesn’t exactly help – I still got to wake up before dawn like usual, but beginning today, everyone else in my house is free of the opression of alarm clocks for a couple of months, and regardless of actual circumstances, it just feels unfair, you know?

But otherwise, I’m fine. I just have to tend to my inner turmoil for a bit, which means the walls I put up are a little thicker than usual. It’s cyclical, and the cycle is swinging back, I promise.

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