monday morning, still down

27 Feb

Had an okay weekend, I suppose. Got the youngest child a new bike on Friday, and she and I had a nice five miler along the river at Dutch Gap on Saturday morning before the weird crazy hail started falling in the afternoon. We had fun, yes we did.

Shame I had the weight of office politics hanging off of me the entire weekend, after *finally* getting that sit down with my boss last thing on Friday after getting stood up for various reasons (both valid and…less so) for the whole week. I won’t go into it all here (it’s not that important), but there’s some new bureaucratic bullshit about resources happening at the upper management levels that have recently changed all the rules about everything and now I have to jump through an entirely new set of hoops to make sure I have the funding to get the stuff done that everybody is telling me I need to, and apparently the scuttlebutt is that the purse strings have gotten really, really tight lately.

Dammit.

So yeah, I’m kind of wrecked with stress and anxiety right now. This stuff will eventually sort itself out, though that knowledge doesn’t help me much when I’m wide awake at 4am, having woken up from dreams about budget shortfalls and politically driven paperwork. Oh yeah.

I’m just going to take it one day, one hour, one meeting at a time. I’ll get through this, and stuff will get done, or it won’t. They’ll keep me around whether or not they give me the resources I need; after all, they keep giving me good reviews, and it’s not like they could replace me anyway right now (this also means I’m kind of stuck where I am at the moment, and this is a stressor in and of itself). I’m just a little overwhelmed, and it’s getting in the way of other things, like internalizing grocery lists and somehow ending up with ten pounds of sugar in the house while forgetting to buy juice boxes for the kids’ lunch.

Dammit.

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