another edition of spam folder poetry

21 Jul

Because I had a full spam folder and a spare half-hour. To recap the rules; I grab interesting phrases, not entirely at random, from the spam comments received on this blog. I take the lines and rearrange them into interesting experiments in free verse. I endeavor to change as little as possible from the original source; I think the most I did here was add a couple of line breaks.

No titles, just commentary on what I think this stuff might mean. You’re more than welcome to feel differently. Enjoy!

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Commentary on outward appearance. Possibly a little sexy:

When you are ridin’ superior and furthermore lookin’ the best out of them
yet you still receive the same sidelong glances and adoring stares.
most people would likely never risk exposing his or her
chicken tucks
which hangs loose below the knees after being knotted
Flushing this device can lead to increased longevity
Thanks a lot and I am taking a
look forward to touch you.

meditation on modern feminism and the traditional roles of women:

People typically inquire me about women’s liberation
probably 3 days a week and doesn’t play very long
Few items define a woman’s sense of fashion more than her accessories
Moms want to make sure there funds is invested properly
the queen is considered one of the most powerful

regarding America’s persistent economic woes:

he notes that your dog keeps “meticulous” track connected with his finances on her computer
The fixed. The existing. The persnickety. The scarce.
our country really has a broken machine

Exploring the philosophy of machismo in rock music:

living is to understand and handle the fundamental metal chords
the rhythm and the riff
you’ll see that I’m not just a natural badass
been recently rough on my claws

How unreasonable expectations of manhood affect adolescent males:

The boy was not behaving well in class
You are forcing the kids to make their individual pancakes
utilize Emma Watson
redefine the rules established by way of patriarchal system

On the commonality of experience at the gaming table:

Practically every person alive these days has most likely played a match of bingo
an unexpected spot of entertainment
after everybody has shared laughter

Society’s difficulty with accepting variance in sexual orientation:

come out in the pub
wear all your trousers; halfmast
unwanted is really a offense
The foxtrot is refined

Societal disaffection with the prominence of sport in popular culture:

After Bird retired, the Celtics were set for some hard times
Quarterback Dude
Make Use of Vertical Space
How Tall Is Aspirin?

Now you understand how the illuminati controls us all:

you’ll see that I’m not just a natural badass
powerful techniques to control the h2o
Ben Affleck video won best picture
The united kingdom attempted to ban cappuccino
Disney Channel Metoclopramide

one single entry; perfect all by itself (and explains a lot):

Keep up the {superb|terrific|very good|great|good|awesome|fantastic|excellent|amazing|wonderful} works guys I’ve {incorporated||added|included} you guys to {|my|our||my personal|my own} blogroll.|

And because I had some leftover text, some bonus band names:

Wellbutrin accident plan
Regional Clicks
Guidebook to Unwanted Fat Biking
Lunch at PeeWee
Motifs could be Animals

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This has been your literary excursion into found art for the day. You should now feel sufficiently cultured.

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