because people need to read this
Sage wisdom about my favorite public transit system courtesy of “master thief” in this fark thread:
Ladies and Gentlemen: Welcome to
Fight ClubMetro.The first rule of Metro is: you do not talk to anyone on Metro.
The second rule of Metro is: YOU DO NOT TALK TO ANYONE ON METRO.
The third rule of Metro: If the chimes sound and the voice says “Step Back,” the doors will close.
The fourth rule of Metro: Only two people to a seat.
The fifth rule of Metro: One stop at a time.
The sixth rule of Metro: Walk left, stand right.
The seventh rule of Metro: Rides will go on for as long as they have to.
And the eighth rule of Metro: If this is your first time riding Metro, you WILL be delayed.
Other than “Thou shalt take ‘please move to the center of the car’ seriously,” this is all you need to know.