“Avast Ye, scurvy bilgerats, to the plank with Ye!”

Yes, Friends, today is Semptember 19, known across the Wide World and the Seven Seas as Talk Like A Pirate Day, so give someone a hearty “Arrrrr!” today.

I wisely haven’t told me kids about this yet…I don’t think their teachers would appreciate it (they both seemed like reasonably nice people last night, after all).

To Honor the day, I’ll post this again…the Pirate Gettysburg Address:

A vast chestful of years, twas, since George’s boys sent them scurvy redcoats fleeing ‘cross the briny, ‘n left us a fair spot where any freebooter twas trim as the next un.

So see here this scurvy fix again’ us, where mate’s set cross-which from mate, ‘n the ship herself near to dashin’ on the black rocks. Put your eye to this here patch o’ dirt, where so many grand, grand hands be takin’ a caulk with Davy. T’aint for us still suckin’ air to say what they done.

Yar, we’s just to put the black spot to them lubbers what did fer our boys, ‘n turn the bow round before we’re all fit for naught but fattenin’ fishes. ‘N see for it that tis a ship crewed by pirates, fit fer pirates, ‘n naught but pirates.

Arrrgggh!

I’ll also give you this:

Anyway, that’d be the big news for the day.

On a slightly more scientific note, a bit of accidental real-world research this morning indicated that the tensile strength of a 7-Eleven Double Gulp cup degrades to the point of failure after approximately eight months of daily refill employ. At least when dropped, fully laden, from a height of three feet or so from the store counter to a commercial tile floor.

The bottom cracks off cleanly, spilling one-point-nine liters of cold, refreshing fountain beverage all over the retail space.

While spectacular to witness, it’s not the best way to start a day, be you the customer or the store employee.

‘Tis all for today, me Hearties!